Erin Andrews Is A Very Serious Journalist & Deserves Respect

I deserve to be taken seriously as a journalist, dammit.

Erin Andrews August 24th Twitterberry

Kim Kardashian & Reggie Bush Call It Quits: Will The Tush Now Pitch For The Dodgers?

Now I have time to make my dreams come true & pitch for the Dodgers. I'm sure nobody will mind the red pumps.

Kim Kardashian 5:12 PM July 27th

Joe Montana & John Elway Have Some Advice For Brett Favre

I don't care what Joe Montana says about my situation. I'm still conflicted & everybody is just going to have to wait until I make up my mind.

Brett Favre 10:18 PM July 26th

Ben Roethlisberger Responds to Assault Allegations

Tweet Of The Day

I did not have sexual relations with that woman...Ms. McNulty. Just look at her. C'mon.

Ben Roethlisberger 9:10 PM July 23rd

Peephole-Gate Update: Erin Andrews Responds to Columnist Christine Brennan

Tweet Of The Day

Playing to the frat house? I was videotaped without my consent in a hotel room. Watch out Christine Brennan - I'm coming after you with my curling iron!

Erin Andrews 10:52 PM July 22nd

Ben Roethlisberger Asaulted This Woman Too...Even Though ESPN Won't Report It

Tweet Of The Day

I ASSaulted this fan too, however, I'm pretty sure she enjoyed the back door lovin'. Hopefully ESPN won't report this story either.

Ben Roethlisberger 10:04 AM Twitterberry

Peep Inside The Hole Of Erin Andrews

Tweet Of The Day

Now Tim Tebow isn't the only one who has peeped into my hole. Thanks to that video there are a couple million other guys too.

Erin Andrews 11:56 AM July 18th

Sarkozy Says He Likes Big Butts

What can I say? Sir Mix-A-Lot and I like what we like. The girl had a very nice derriere and I took a few seconds to admire it.

Nicolas Sarkozy July 10th 6:16 PM

Sarah Is Lookin' Forward To Life After Politics

The heck with all this partisan politics stuff. I'm goin' fishin' & huntin'!!

Sarah Palin 11:20 PM July 7th

Sarah Palin To Host Talk Show? You Betcha

I have a higher calling in life and have decided to become a daytime talk show host. Look out Oprah, I'm comin' after ya.

Former Governor Sarah Palin 12:31 AM July 5th

Simon Cowell Needs To Make A Lot More Money

$36 million a year for "American Idol" is OK, but I really need to make at least $100 million so I can afford to feed my family.

Simon Cowell 12:42 PM June 30th from Twitterberry

Jon & Kate Are Irate

Michael Jackson's death was a very sad story, but now nobody is talking about us anymore. It's just not fair!

Jon & Kate 4:44 PM June 27th

Michael Cera Is Not Funny

A dead man has about as much range as I do as an actor. Maybe I'm just not that funny. "Year One" is bombing and I must be the reason.

Michael Cera 7:00 PM June 23rd

Fathers Day Is Very Busy For Evander Holyfield

Shawn Kemp is on Easy Street. Since I have 11 kids with 9 different women I'm simply exhausted on Fathers Day. Can't Keep all my kids straight.

Evander Holyfield 9:09 June 21st

Hillary Clinton's Face Just Before Falling & Fracturing Her Elbow

I was just on my way into the White House & tripped over a jump rope. I'm really not very happy with Sasha and Malia right now.

Hillary Clinton 10:22 PM June 17th

The Latest From Professional Football Player & Waffler Brett Favre

I know 90% of all sports fans think I'm a publicity whore, but I don't care. I'm going to milk this as long as I possibly can.

Brett Favre 12:06 AM June 16th

Is Will Ferrell's Act Wearing Thin?

"Land Of The Lost" made how much this past weekend? Hmmmm...maybe I need to come up with a new act.

Will Ferrell 12:22 PM June 15th

Shaq Headed To Cleveland To Play With LeBron?

First I was the Big Aristotle, then the Big Cactus, and soon I could become The Big Mistake On The Lake.

Shaquille O'Neal 9:21 AM June 14th

Stan Van Gundy Rates His Performance In Game 4

Up 3 points with less than 10 seconds to go...maybe we should have fouled Fisher. I'm an idiot. What else can I say?

Stan Van Gundy 5:51 PM June 12th

Sarah Palin Is Fightin' Mad

You are a big meanie, David Letterman. Stop pickin' on me and my family.

Governor Sarah Palin 4:10 PM June 11th